Thursday, March 6, 2008

Every time I start to think I get worse.

I can't stop thinking of the physical feelings and, how he didn't tell me, didn't warn

me. He told me on that thursday he fully slid into my once (tuesday), I'm not sure

how often he partially slid into me. He would be messing around and rubbing against

me. I just assumed he was against my clit but then there'd be a sharp pain and I'd

force him away. It kind of felt good but I feel like I should've been more vocal.

Should've figured it out sooner. I guess, I can understand my ignorance on one hand,

because I've never been one to mess around with my vagina and prefer that it's left

alone. I also, wonder why this hurts me so much when I didn't realize what was going

on at the time. But I guess a lot of it is betrayal I feel.

I wish I could turn off my brain.

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